Former Canadian soldier given a new chance to shine at Invictus Games
This week in Toronto, the Invictus Games are playing host to current and formermilitary members who are "wounded, ill or injured" from around the world.
But for HlneLe Scelleur, those injuries are invisible scars. The now-retired Canadian Army Captain suffered a post-traumatic stress injury (PTSI) after a convoy she was riding in was hit by animprovised explosive devicein Afghanistan in 2007.
Check out her Invictusprofile and event results here.
The invitation to compete in the Invictus Games represented a second chance to be an active member of a team, and to raise awareness of the psychological effects of war that can affect soldiers just as much as a physical injury.
Today, she's a force to be reckoned with, competing in multiple events such as wheelchair rugby, rowing, and four different sprinting events on the track.
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"Eight months ago, I wouldn't have imagined where I am today,"LeScelleur toldAs It Happenshost Carol Off.
"It was an amazing journey, and looking backwards and at my life before, the progress that I made, I'm just so happy for me. It's like I've already won the game, in my mind."
She and her team waited for four hours for assistance in the wrecked vehicle, not knowing when help would arrive, or if they would come under attack again.
At the time, Le Scelleur saysher training and instincts took over to survey the situation. But she didn't confront just how scared she was at that moment until years later.
"I didn't realize until afterward that I was really scared ... I was afraid to die that night," she says.
Luckily, no one was killed in the attack. But the mental scars lingered for years. She struggled with alcoholism, recurring nightmares and suicidal thoughts.
After returning from Afghanistan, LeScelleurbecame part of then-governor general Michalle Jean's security detail. But before long the PTSIbecame too much to handle, and she resigned, and was effectively placed "on the shelf" by her superiors.
"Having people come to me say 'you were the star of our branch and now you're a black sheep,' and being put on the shelf didn't help at all," she told Off.
"We have great resources to take care of our wounded veterans or soldiers, but there's still a stigma within the ranks, within the units, and also a stigma that you're still weak if you seek help. And that's going to be a huge shift that needs to happen sometime."
She was discharged in 2016, after serving for 26 years.
Renewed purpose
Training for and competing in the InvictusGames has givenLeScelleur a renewed sense of purpose.
"Because of the PTSI, I wasn't doing any training any more.It was a big deal just coming out of my house," she says. "So it did help in a lot of ways to just become active again, and also to meet new people, and new environments, and expose myself to some of the triggers Iwas experiencing and to be able to overcome them."
Competing in the wheelchair rugby event was a particularly enriching experience forLeScelleur. Unlike most other competitors she still has full use of her legs, so she was initially unsure of whether the rest of her team would accept her.
"But they werelike, 'No Hlne, we know why we're here, and we're supporting you.'And after the games they invited me to practice with them. so I'm so happy.
The physical sport, nicknamed "murderball," often involved players' wheelchairs clanging into each other.LeScelleursays the noise initially brought back memories of the crashes and other noises of the IED incident in Afghanistan.
"It did remind me of the sound of that night when our vehicle was involved in the IED strike," she said. But being exposed, and exposing yourself (to it)makes you develop some mechanism to cope with the triggers. Now, because Iam enjoying the sport so much, I don't necessarily hear that any more."
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