January is a popular time to get divorced, therapists say

For many people, January is a new beginning a time to toss away all the baggage of yesteryear and wipe the slate clean.

Consequently,for many divorce lawyers and family therapists, it'sthe busiest month of the year.

Accordingto psychologistand divorce specialist Susan Gamache, January is 'divorce month' a peak time of the year whenmany married couples in troubled relationships choose to call it quits.

"People try to keep it together through the holidays," she toldhost Gloria Macarenko on CBC'sBC Almanac."Nobody wants to have their children's Christmas remembered as the time their parents announced a separation."

The term 'divorce month' has taken on it's own life in legal circles, due to the surge in breakups. Gamache says it's a time when divorce filings start getting made, and appointments to family therapists are booked.

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While divorces can be messy, Garmache says its important to stay educated and informed as to how to make them run smoothly. And if there's children involved, she has one key piece of advice: keep them in the centre.

"The children aren't divorcing anybody, and this is still going to be their family going forward."

Divorce ceremonies

The current divorce rate in Canada hovers above 45 per cent, according to Garmache. And while breakups are inherently ugly, one woman says divorces can be beautiful.

Barbara Densmoreis a contemporary minister and celebrant from Nanaimo. She officiates weddings and memorialsbut also offers a more peculiar service: divorce ceremonies.

"Divorce is basically the only major life transition for which we have no ritual we don't really know what to do," she said.

Unlike marriage, which is marked by both ceremonies and document filing, she says divorce is marred by longevity, which often includes numerous conversations, paperwork, and court appearances.

She says the whole process can be stressful, and lack closure.

"A lot of the people I'm working with are finding that they need to do somethingintentional to be able to process what's happening, and try to keep grounded going through ... and any form of ceremony can help with that."

She refers to it as a dignified farewell, where couples undo their vows, make a commitment to their childrenand wave a formalgoodbye to one another.

"In a perfect setting, a divorce ceremony would be an un-wedding ceremony."

With files from CBC's BC Almanac

To listen to the full interview, click on the audio labelled:January is a popular time to get divorced, therapists say