Christmas with the Bantlemans, from Canada to Jakarta

Corinne Bantleman didn't decorate her home last Christmas. She didn't bake, or see either of her two sons on Dec. 25.

"It was the year Christmas didn't happen," said Bantleman, 83.

I didn't think that I had the strength to bear this burden.- CorinneBantleman

But this year, joy and hope are seeping back in after a tumultuous year-and-a-half that saw her youngest son Neil imprisoned across the world in Indonesiafor crimes he was later acquitted of.

An understated woman who came to Canada in the 1970s after living in England and India, Corinne Bantlemanhas discoveredthrough the ordeala depth of strength she never knew she had.

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"That ache that I used to have, it's a sort of an ache that you really don't it's not a physical ache, you know? It's an intangible ache," she said. "That's gone now, which I'm pleased to say."

That ache arrived when Corinne's son, Neil, 46, was sent to jail in Indonesia last year, detained on allegations of sexually assaultingthree kindergarten students at Jakarta International School (JIS), now known as Jakarta Intercultural School.

Family support

His family, in Burlington, has stood steadfastly behind Neil from the beginning, proclaiming his innocence and raising questions aboutthe integrity of the entire casethroughout a volatile, emotional year:

In April, he and teacher's aide Ferdinant Tjiongwere found guiltyand sentenced to 10 years in prison.

In August, the conviction was overturned, to the Bantlemans'great delight. And while Neilcan't leave the country while prosecutors appeal that decision, the Bantleman family feels differently this December.

"That is the most important thing, knowing he's free," Corinne Bantleman said. "Which he wasn't last year."

Corinne and family members gathered early this week in Neil's brother, Guy Bantleman's living room, telling stories of the emotional peaks and valleys of the last year-and-a-half.

They looked ahead to both this Christmas and Christmases to come when they anticipate being reunited with Neil and his wife, Tracy Bantleman.

This year, they'll settle for a couple of Skype calls with Neil and Tracy, staggered over the 12-hour time difference between Ontario and Jakarta.

Celebrations across the world

"I actually was able to do some decorating this year," Corinne said. "And bake some cakes and that sort of thing, which I didn't do, didn't have the heart last year."

Neilwho also taught in Calgary and Tracy will celebrate Christmas, too, with other expat friends in Indonesia. They sent a photograph this week of a sort-of Christmas tree made from painted, dried palm fronds.

For a family that has walked a careful, choreographed public line while Neil's ordeal continues in Indonesia, the conversation with CBC News showed a glimpse of the human impact the situation has caused in the hearts of Neil's mom, dad, brother and niece and nephew.

"We think we just wanted to have a nice, quiet peaceful old age, and suddenly we are thrust into the limelight," said Corinne. She and her husband, Hugh, are both in their 80s.

"It's exposed a side of me which I didn't know existed," she said. "That I've been so strong. I didn't think that I had the strength to bear this burden."

'Hello, Grandma'

Corinne Bantleman went to Indonesia this summer to see her son in prison, to be there for his 46th birthday on May 30.

"In the prison, I became quite friendly with all the guards," she said. "So every time I'd show up, every morning, they'd refer to me as 'Grandma.' 'Hello, Grandma.'"

Every morning, she said, she went through a security check and was given a ticket to wait in a hangar-like room.

"And of course it's so hot there. And then you get all of these odours. All the families would be waiting to see their relatives and friends," she said. "The first day I thought, 'Ah, I can't stand this.'"

An idea came, one she used to employ when she'd get off the Tube in England when she first moved there from India in the 1950s.

"The following day I took my perfume and sprayed the air with it," she said.

'I knew I wouldn't be seeing him again; I didn't knowfor how long'

She was there for three weeks. The last day was the most difficult, she said.

"I knew I wouldn't be seeing him again, I didn't know for how long," she said. "Because at that time, he was starting serving a so-called 10-year sentence."

The memory of leaving him flooded her face as she retoldit this week.

"I still picture him standing"

She stopped, beginning to cry. Guy's daughter, Rachel, 21, walked over and sat on the arm of her grandmother's chair.

"That was my last memory of him," Corinne said.

The family sat for a quiet moment while Corinne composed herself.

"He'll be home, Mom," Guy said.

"I know," she said. "I can't wait to see him again."

kelly.bennett@cbc.ca