Clear communication can help defuse conflict with angry customers during a stressful shopping season: expert

A social worker in the Waterloo, Ont., region wants to remind people to be kind to local businesses this holiday shopping season, as changing COVID-19 protocols, supply chain issues and labour shortages may be a recipe for conflict.

"Most of us are just trying to do the best we can to get through the day, to get through this pandemic, and so the more we can remember that we're all humans doing the best we can and to be compassionate and kind [the better],"said Thomas Brown, a social worker and co-owner of Qualia Counselling Services (QCS).

QCSoffers mental health and counselling services in Waterloo region, Brantford and Ohsweken, in addition toconflict resolution and de-escalation training.

He said going into a second pandemic holiday combined withfinancial problems,family engagements ordifferent views around vaccines can be stressful.

Not finding what you're looking for due to supply chain issues,waiting in line for long periods of timeorforgetting proof of vaccination could be what breaks the camel's back,Brown said.

"It's sort of one more thing added on top of an already stressful time that would cause people to get upset and maybe get a little belligerent or even a little aggressive," he said.

So what can employees do?

Brown offered some skills that employees can keep in their back pocket should a conflict arise. The first thingis to take a deep breath, he said.

"It can be really helpful to take a breath and get ourselves first in a place where we can handle this with our brains fully turned on and not functioning from emotion," he said.

Brown said employees can alsolet the customer know they have been heard. That acknowledgement canhelp bring people back down and move onto solving the issue.

Brown said it's important for employees to remember that it's OKto be assertive and establishboundaries with customers who cross a line.

"Assertive communication is just being clear and forward, concisein what we need and what we want," he said."Something like, 'I want to help you, but it's not OKthat you're yelling at me.'"

Brown said authorities should be calledif de-escalating the situation is not working and "certainly if it's moving to physical threats or aggression."

Businesses feeling the brunt

Business owners such asLauren Kirkin Cambridge and Rufus Cavanin Kitchener are all too familiar with those kinds of situations.

Kirk, whoowns the clothing store The Patch, said mask-wearing has been an ongoing issue for her businessand she's noticed thatcustomers havebecome more relaxed about putting on their masks.

"Sometimes our customers will get 10 feet in the door before they start pulling their mask out of their pocket." she said.

Kirk said her employees also deal with customers who don't want to wear a mask. In those situations, they ask the individual to leave. Sometimes it goes smoothly, sometimes it doesn't, she said.

"We try not to escalate the situation as much as possible because, unfortunately, a lot of the anti-maskers that come in tend to look for a confrontation."

Cavan said his business, Cavan Coffee in Kitchener and Guelph,has dealt with customers who want to eat at the caf but don't have proof of vaccination.

"They always seem to blame us for it, [when]it's a mandate that's from our province, and it's hard to bridge that gap of understanding where people think it's something we're doing to them," he said.

Ultimately, Brown said, customers need to remember that employees and businesses are trying their best and "outcomes are better when people arekind and compassionate to one another."