Winnipeg woman says she developed addiction to meth in sober housing
Stephanie Siddle says the first time she tried crack cocaine was while living in a drug-freeapartmentrun by the Addictions Foundation of Manitoba.
"Everyone was using. There was not a single person who didn't," saidSiddle, 32, whowas a tenant at River Point Apartments.
She said instead of being kept safe and sober in the abstinence-based housing, she was exposed to methamphetamine and tried it for the first time.
Now she's lost faith in the system because that's where she developed an addiction that's destroying her life, she said.
"I hate the drug," she said. "But I keep using just to not be sick. It was fun in the beginning, and now it just seems like work."
Siddleusesmethevery few weeks or whenever she has money, and has been for two years.
In January 2016,Siddle moved into the abstinence-basedtransitional housing on Magnus Avenue. The 30-suite apartment buildingis owned by Manitoba Housing and run by the AFM and a non-profit organization, SAM Management.
The buildingis attached to AFM's River Point Centre, which offers drug treatment to as many as 2,000 people a year.
Everyone was using. There was not a single person who didn't.- Stephanie Siddle on life atRiver Point Apartments
Siddlewas referred as a tenant by the Behavioural Health Foundation after she completed a six-month residential treatment for mental health issues and alcohol and pill use.
Shewas one of the first peopleto sign a lease at the facility, andit wasn't long before a drug dealer moved in, she said.
She failed mandatory drug testing, which was part of the lease agreement, and entered detox for five days, she said. Shewas evicted after failing a second drug test.
"I was angry and upset and I didn't know what I was going to do and I felt disappointment," she said. "It just made me want to use more."
The AFM would not comment on Siddle'stenancy specifically.
"I wouldn't ever debate somebody's perspectiveor perception," said Laura Goossen, the director of River Point Centre.
"I'm not sure everybody would have been in the situation she's describing, but I wouldn't question that there were people like her who were really struggling."
Goossen saidtenants agree to random drug testing when signing their lease. However, she said, there isn't azero- tolerance policy because relapse is often part of the recovery process.
"One of the things the staff talk to them about is just strongly encouraging them to say, 'Hey, slips are part of recovery.Please let us know and our role is to help you get back on track if that's what you'd like to do,'" Goossen said.
If tenants at River Point Apartments are not committed to their recovery plan they couldbe evicted, she said. Other reasonsfor eviction includefailure to pay rent and engaging in behaviours that put other tenants in danger dealing drugs, for example.
The highest rate of evictions happened in the first year, she said.
Changes made
The AFM only filled half the suites in the first yearas a test run for the new facility, Goossen said.
However, there was a learning curve and changes had to be made.
"One was we asked government, Manitoba Health, for additional funding for additional staffing, and that was approved in the fall of 2016," she said. "The second change was our screening criteria."
The AFM now has two full-time staff, both with addictions backgrounds, at the apartment six days a week. One is the case manager, who works with tenants on their recovery plans. The other is the community integration co-ordinator, who helps tenants with life skills and re-entering society.
As for screening, Goossen saidapplications are reviewed by a selection committee that considers things like the applicant's experience in treatment and the kind of community supports they have.
"Potential tenant needs to be able to manage independent living, because ultimately that is what this is," Goossen said.
Siddlebelieves she would not havebecome addicted to meth had she moved into a regularapartmentinstead of the sober-living facility.
"Since we all knew that we were all drug addicts [we] just kind of fed off each other," she said. "It failed. It failed miserably."
No hope
NowSiddle is living in an apartmentin an area full of meth addicts. Her mother pleads with her on a regular basis to move home or to give treatment another shot.
"I bring her food all the time to make sure she's eating and make sure she can maintain her whopping 75 pounds or whatever it is. It's hard, it's really hard," said Corinne Siddle.
She doesn't know what else to do for her daughter.
Stephanie was full of hope when she finished treatment in 2015 and moved into River Point Apartments, her mother said. She was looking forward to putting her psychology degree to use and finding a job.
Potential tenant needs to be able to manage independent living, because ultimately that is what this is.- LauraGoossen, the director of River Point Centre
Instead, she said, they saw a year of decline that has turned into two years of meth use.
"We're not looking very hopeful at all, and I'm not seeing a lot of hope to get off the meth," the mother said. "At this point, she's just so frustrated and so upset with the system. She doesn't feel there's help."
Siddle saidshe wants to quit, but doesn't see a future for herself.
"Who am I supposed to become. Like, I'm not that Stephanie from two years ago. Like, I was, 'Don't feel like her anymore,'" she said. "I just feel scared to just live a normal life again I just can't seem to figure it out."
Goossen saidshe's heard from many drug users who have described this kind of hopelessness and are now far along their recovery paths.
"I would just really, really encourage her, and any family members to seek support for themselves because that is a really tough place to be," she said.
There is currently a more than 200-day waiting list for women wanting to get into drug treatment.
Walk-in assessments are available at rapid access to addictions medicine (RAAM) clinics, which were announced in May, Goossen said.
"For somebody like that, who's feeling like I am not sure how motivated I am and it sounds like she is really questioning thatsometimes a walk-in and not waiting for an appointment is the way to go," she said.
_(720p).jpg)
 OFFICIAL HD MUSIC VIDEO.jpg)
.jpg)
