Families of 3 Saskatchewan murder-suicide victims warn about exit dangers

A social worker, a law student, and a conservationist.

Three Saskatchewan women whowere killed by their intimate partners in homicide-suicides in the past five years whose stories have gone untold so far.

What did they all have in common?

Family and friends saythey were leaving their partner when the situation turned deadly.

January 2015 Sharon Ann Kinequon

Sharon Ann Kinequon, 48, worked asa social worker forSaskatchewan's Ministry of Social Services in Prince Albertandoften helpedchildren escape violence in the home. Yet, she wasn't immune to domestic violence herself.

"She was quite a special person," her brother, Chester Kinequon, told CBC.Eight siblings in the family had attended residential school andstruggledwith addictions issues.

"Sharon fought through it all,"Chester said, boasting that his sister hadcompleted a double Bachelors degree in Native Studies and social work so she could help other Aboriginal people with their healing.

So when Sharon's common law spouse, Bobby Nippi, another residential school survivor,began drinking heavily, the mother-of-three tried to stick it out and help him.Chester says his sister called police to intervene on at least one occasion.

In January 2015, she was preparing to leave the relationship and had even found a new place to live, family members say, but something went horriblyand tragically wrong in the process.

On January 24,Melfort RCMP reported a woman, 48, and man, 46, had died in an apparent murder-suicide. The coroner's office has not completed its report.

February2012 Dianne Martell

From the start of their relationship,Dianne Martell's family suspected that her new husband, Blair Ilg, was trying to controland isolate her.

"It seemed like I could never talk to her privately," Dianne's sister, Yvonne Martell, said. Whether she visited Dianne in person or simply called her on the telephone, Yvonne says Ilg would sit next to Dianne and monitor their conversations.

The couple moved from Saskatoon to Prince Albert, where they lived inIlg's parents' basement suite.

Family members say Martellwas preparing to leave her husband three months before her death but then, for whatever reason, she stayed.

Domestic violence experts say a womanleaves an abusive partner, on average, seven to eight times before she leaves for good.

In February 2012, family members say -once again -Martell seemed stagedto leave her husband.

On February 19, a violent argumenterupted in their home in Prince Albert. Martell was reportedly heard screaming, "He's goingto kill me."

A coroner's report confirmsIlg shot his wife before turning the gun on himself.

March 2011 Debbie Eisenhut

In March 2011, Debbie Eisenhut,56, had a plan to leave her girlfriend, Colleen Cote, 51, whom she lived with on a farm near Glaslyn, Sask.

Eisenhut, a passionate nature lover and conservationist, worked for theMinistry of Environmentwith Cote at Battlefords Provincial Park and the couplehad dated for about two years.

Friends say Eisenhut had trepidation about leaving Cote, but it wasn't her own safety that worried her.

Cote had reportedly attempted suicide after a previous relationship ended.

Those who knewaboutCote's historysaytheydidn't realize aprior suicide attempt is a red flag common to people who kill family members.

Eisenhuthad a plan to leave and a place to go.

Her friends say she was astrong andresourceful woman. She raised her son as a single mother and worked several jobs. She was also, many said, a kindhearted person who would give the shirt off her back to help others.

The night before Eisenhutwas setto leave, things turned deadly.

Cote shot Eisenhut, then committed suicide by carbon monoxide poisoning.

RCMPfound their bodies two days lateron March 6, 2011 andthe coroner ruled it a homicide-suicide.

• Rural Sask. deaths were murder-suicide: RCMP

Red Flags

A pending or recent separation is one of the most common contributing factors to domestic homicides.

An expert panel in Ontario that reviews every killing by an intimate partner or ex-partnerhas concluded75 per centof the killingsare "predictable and potentially preventable."

It has compiled a list of 39 risk factorsand determined that a person with seven or more well-known risk factors is more likely to kill a family member. Common red flags include a pending or recent separation, a history of domestic violence, escalating violence, obsessive behaviour, depressionand prior death threats.

Experts make several recommendations to safely leave a relationship. They include:

• Recognize the risk (i.e. has your partner made death or suicide threats? does your partner own a gun?)
• Develop a safety plan (i.e. identify a shelter or safe place, compile your documents)
• Leave first. Do not inform your partner of your intentions.
• Build a support network of people to help you