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6 Ways To Work With Picky Eaters

By Erik Missio
Photo by KatarzynaBialasiewicz/istockphoto

Feb 8, 2016

Do you have a toddler going through a nothing-but-cereal phase? Or a 10-year-old who never wants to eat what you make for dinner?

Sarah Remmer, a registered dietitian and nutrition blogger from Calgary, says every child typically goes through some sort of picky eating stage. It can be hard on parents, but it’s often normal behaviour for kids.

Whether it’s liking a particular dish one day and spitting it out the next, or refusing certain colours or textures, picky eating should eventually end if parents are patient and work with kids in a healthy manner.

Here are six tips that parents can use to help keep picky eaters healthy and happy:

1. Serve one meal to the whole family

If your family is having pasta for dinner, it may be tempting to make your fussy eater a peanut butter sandwich on the side—but Remmer says this can fuel the problem.

“Unfortunately, many well-meaning parents enable their child’s picky eating by making them special meals of their ‘safe’ foods night after night,” she says. “This won’t give the child an opportunity to widen his or her palate.”

The meal should always include at least one food each child loves.

Instead, there should be one meal served to the whole family. The meal should always include at least one food each child loves (even if it’s just bread), so they have something to eat if they aren’t ready to try the other foods.

2. Stick to a regular eating schedule

When it comes to mealtime, Dr. Jamesie Coolican—a Halifax psychologist who works with children with feeding difficulties—quotes the dietitian Ellyn Satter about dividing responsibility.

“Parents are responsible for what, when and where their child eats,” says Coolican. “And the child is responsible for how much and whether they eat.”

She suggests parents set the stage for better dinners by having regularly scheduled meals and snacks, spaced out by two or three hours with no grazing on food or drink (except water) in between.

Meals should last for a maximum of 30 minutes, ideally at a table free of distractions.

Mealtime is also about family time.

Remmer says it’s important your picky eater come to the table at supper regardless of whether he or she wants to eat, because mealtime is also about family time.

She suggests reminding children to fill their tummies now because the kitchen will be closed afterward.

3. Involve kids in planning, shopping and preparing food

Having kids participate in planning, shopping and preparing meals can also be a huge help. Remmer says if the child has a hand in making or planning a meal, it’s more likely he or she will eat it.

You can also ask kids how food could be made yummier. There can be a big change with something as simple as adding a little ketchup or cheese, cutting the veggies or meat in a new way, or separating different types of food so they don’t touch.

4. Focus on the positive

Coolican suggests parents lay off the pressure and try to emphasize the ‘eating,’ rather than the ‘not eating.’ This means stop coaxing, encouraging and negotiating! Instead, start praising when the child does take a bite.

5. Remember that change takes time

Pickiness tends to be at its peak from ages two to seven. Remmer says it can take up to 20 non-pressured exposures to a food—and a lot of parental patience—before a child is ready to try and/or accept a new food for the first time.

6. Know when to seek help

Sometimes, having a picky eater is a hassle, but other times, it’s a real cause for concern.

“Parents should seek help when their child’s weight or growth is compromised or they are excluding an entire food group,” explains Coolican. “First, they should talk to their family physician, who should be aware of supports in the community.”

Remmer says most kids get the nutrients they need overall, even if it looks like they are not eating very much on any given day.

Dealing with extreme picky eating can feel hopeless and isolating.

However, when tendencies cross the borders of what’s considered ‘normal’ and start affecting a child’s growth, weight, mood and family mealtimes in a drastic way, it’s time to seek help from a paediatrician and qualified paediatric dietitian.

“Dealing with extreme picky eating can feel hopeless and isolating,” she adds. “It also causes worry, stress and sometimes panic for parents, as well as anxiety, fear and social isolation for the child.”

When a situation seems impossible, health professionals can help.

Do you have a picky eater? How have you been trying to keep them—and the rest of your family—happy and healthy?

Article Author Erik Missio
Erik Missio

Read more from Erik here.

Erik Missio used to live in Toronto, have longish hair and write about rock ‘n’ roll. He now lives in the suburbs, has no hair and works in communications. He and his wife are the proud parents of a nine-year-old girl and a five-year-old boy, both of whom are pretty great. He received his MA in journalism from the University of Western Ontario.