8 Things I’ve Learned Working on Parenting Content for Over 10 Years

After working on parenting content for over ten years as a writer, a producer, an editor, a proof-reader and a fact-checker, I have noticed a lot of trends. I’ve seen all kinds of parenting brands emerge and disappear. I’ve watched as each new wave of parents takes to social media and speaks about parenting as though they invented it (I did it too, I’m not throwing stones here). But I've also uncovered some constants — the things that I believe are unalterably true about parenthood and parents. Here, then, are eight things I’ve learned after working on parenting content for more than a decade:

• There is no right way to do any of this. There are some wrong ways (anything that endangers, harms or demeans a child, for example), but there’s no right way. Anyone who tries to convince you there is only one way to be a good parent is selling something.
• Everyone just wants to know that they’ve made the right decisions. We all have our own hot-button subjects — the parenting stuff that makes us feel defensive and prone to writing lengthy comments on friends’ Facebook posts. I believe these subjects trigger us because it’s hard to question the choices you’ve made for your family, and when other families make different choices, it can feel threatening. Good news though, as per point one: there is no right way to do any of this!
   
• Parenthood doesn’t need to be redefined. It doesn’t need to be cooler or chicer or more rebellious. Brands will pop up and try to tell us that parenting was never *really* cool until they finally came along. But, fun fact, all of us mamas and dadas are just perfect as we are. Same goes for all of the mamas and dadas who came before us. Parenthood has always been a blend of the glorious and the gruelling, the magical and the mundane, and it always will be.

No matter who you are, where you live or how you live, parental love looks a heck of a lot alike.

• Becoming a parent changes everything. And that’s not a bad thing. I recently heard a new dad say that he felt like he was the same person, but it's like he was finally seeing the world in 3D now that he's a dad. And that feels about right. 
   
• Not all “parenting experts” are created equal. Sometimes a parenting expert is a trained counselor, social worker, psychologist, doctor or other professional. Sometimes a parenting expert is someone who has put a lot of time, thought and learning into parenting strategies. Sometimes a parenting expert is just someone who started a blog and called themselves an expert one day. I think all of these kinds of “experts” can legitimately have things to offer, but the point is that just because someone says they’re a parenting expert doesn’t mean you have to believe them, especially if what they’re saying makes you feel like crap.
   
• No one who is a parent has it all together. No one. If someone seems like they do, don’t worry about it, because it’s an illusion.
   
• We could all use more help. This business of raising kids is no joke. Whether you’re doing it alone, you're doing it with a partner, you’re doing it while you’re working or you’re doing it while you’re not working, it’s all kinds of difficult. So let’s all just give each other a break, and remember to help other parents when we have the energy/means/resources to do so.
   
• Everyone just loves their babies. That’s it. At the end of the day, there is little that is more unifying than the particularly fierce brand of love that parents have for their kids. No matter who you are, where you live or how you live, parental love looks a heck of a lot alike. I think that if we all spent more time thinking about that, and less thinking about some of the shittier aspects of humanity, we’d feel a lot better. 

So, here’s to you, mamas and dadas. I think you're wonderful, and I’m glad you’re here.