a young kid dressed as an elephant for Halloween
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Halloween is an Expensive, Commercial Nightmare But Here’s Why It’s Good for Kids

By Rob Thomas 

Photo © crystalmariesing/Twenty20

Oct 29, 2018

I strolled into a big-box hardware store the other day and found myself face to face with a blood-curdling monstrosity. It was a seven-foot-tall skeletal Tyrannosaurus Rex, which towered over a brood of other gaudy and oversized Halloween lawn ornaments, not dwarfed in the slightest by the soaring aisles of tools, fixtures, fittings and lumber. It was terrifying. If my dinosaur-obsessed seven-year-old had been with me, my peril would have been absolute. The only thing more imposing than the creature itself was the price tag. At the time, I was grumbling over a $50 furnace filter which I actually needed. I felt better about that purchase immediately.


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Halloween is not what it used to be. Don't get me wrong, it is scary. But in all the wrong ways. At its worst, Halloween has become a commercialized ghoul fest that seems well on its way to overtake Christmas in the money-well-wasted department. But do not despair. There is hope. I have learned to love Halloween. And you can love it, too — that is, if you don't already do. There are great reasons to embrace the monster.


Unfettered Creativity and Self-Expression

A few years ago, my eldest son decided he was done with those flimsy, overpriced superhero costumes. His decision was based in part by the fact that every boy in his class was wearing more or less the same thing year to year. But it also came from a desire to feel more grown up, because he wanted to be something scary. He landed on a skeleton, which is pretty traditional. Then he added a pumpkin mask he made with a paper plate, an old witch’s hat and a pair of ghoul gloves he found at a dollar store. The result was terrifying, and confused many neighbours on the doorstep, but the look was all his own. No other holiday offers a kid such unfettered opportunities for self-expression. 


Learn to Plan and Set Goals

I like to help my three kids with their costumes, if they want my help. But I have some rules. The biggest one: They must decide on their Halloween night costume by the first week of October. I am a handy dad. I can help them sew a Jedi cape or affix aluminum foil to a box with the best of them, but I enjoy these things more with fair warning. I also demand that they come up with a rough plan for exactly when they intend to put in the work. This means weekends in October can get pretty busy, but my kids get to experience working towards a goal that they are genuinely excited about. It’s like a science fair project with a bigger pay off.


Meet the Neighbours

Aside from a boozy street party, I can think of no better way of getting to know your neighbours than showing up on their doorstep with a three-year-old in a fuzzy bear costume. You also figure out pretty quickly whether they are dentists.


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Independence Without Fear

When the kid outgrows that fuzzy bear costume, you can send them out door-to-door on their own. Halloween is the one night that you can be pretty much assured that some parent or neighbour will have an eye on your kid to ensure they’re safe. Trick-or-treating with friends is a great way to let older kids demonstrate their independence and responsibility. Nothing to fear, ghouls notwithstanding.


Big Questions, Low Pressure

I’ll never forget the day my son asked me what zombies were for. It was one of those spontaneous pop quizzes that youngsters love to administer.

“Zombies are scary because they are supposed to be dead but they aren’t,” I offered.

“Aren’t they just not-dead (alive) then?” he countered.

“I guess they are dead in all the ways that really matter. They don’t remember their family or anything that was important to them in life,” I said. “They just want to eat brains.”

“OK,” he said.

Halloween is all about the dark stuff that makes us anxious and afraid. It lets us feel those feelings just enough, then reminds ourselves it’s just make-believe.

I must have passed that quiz because he stopped asking me about the undead.

Article Author Rob Thomas
Rob Thomas

Read more from Rob here.

Rob Thomas is a writer, editor and a work-at-home dad. Brood, a book of poems inspired by his experiences of fatherhood, was launched at the Ottawa International Writers Festival in 2014. His journalism has appeared in places such as Ottawa Magazine, the United Church Observer, Canadian Running and on CBC radio and television. He is also a founding member of an Ottawa social club for dads called The Ugly Mothers.