My Adoption Story - Part 1

[A blogger recounts her journey in trying to adopt a child from Pakistan as a single woman. This is the first blog in a several part series.]

This blog is for a parents' site, but I am not a parent. I can't debate the merits of breast milk versus formula feeds. I don't belong to a local La Leche League, nor do I have any claim to "baby whisperer" fame. I am a single woman, and I am in the process of adopting a baby from the Edhi Orphanage in Karachi, Pakistan. Welcome to my adoption story.

I always knew that I wanted to be a mother, and I am at a point where I don't want to wait any longer for the "right" man to come into my life. I am ready now. Ready to face the joys and challenges of parenthood. I know that it's going to be a difficult journey, but adoption is something that feels right for me.

If you had asked me five years ago, I wouldn't have considered adoption as an option. In both my dreams and daily imaginings, I saw myself with a handsome hubby and much-loved baby — a typical hallmark family. Today, my definition of family has altered slightly. It is something that has changed with our world's changing reality. From two-parent households, to single mothers, single fathers and blended groups, I know that I will be in good company.

So, how did I get to this place? Like most women, I've probably let a few "good" ones slip away. Yes, I admit it. It's a common ail of the modern woman, measuring would-be suitors against impossibly high, exacting standards. I've even had a few "arranged marriage" proposals from families who were convinced that I was the "perfect" girl for their "perfect" boy. Needless to say, I am far too much of a romantic to even consider an arrangement that involves my heart. Have I been in love? Yes. But sometimes distance, timing and even the sly hand of fate can take a ragged toll.

One thing is certain: I don't want to marry someone that I am not in love with for the sake of having a child. It's simply not fair. Not fair to a man and certainly not fair to a baby. That's far too much pressure for anyone to live under. As a passionate A-type personality, I still intend on having it all. I've just slightly altered the order. The next person I meet will have to have room in his heart for both baby and me.

To be honest, I am not quite certain that my adoption story will have the ending that I desire. I just know that I am doing everything in my power to make it happen. Ultimately, it's about having the belief and the courage to take great risks. I want to live a life that I am proud to call my own. Am I scared? I've never been more scared in my life, and that's a good thing. Over the next little while, I'll be sharing my adoption experiences with you. I hope to be as open and honest as possible, covering everything from the process in Canada, to reactions of friends and family, the journey to Pakistan, my joys and my fears.

Upcoming: In Part 2, our blogger hopes that the people she shares her plans with will support her decision to adopt internationally as a single woman.