How to Talk About Your Salary With Co-Workers

The days of viewing salary conversations as confidential discussions reserved for only the boss are long gone or at least they should be. Sure, at an executive level, its a different story, but for levels below a director, heres why its completely healthy for you to talk about what you earn among those who arent your boss.

According to a study on money and relationships from TheCashlorette.com , Americans under the age of 36 discuss how much money they make with their immediate family (63%), a friend (48%) and even coworkers (30%). In fact, 33% of older Millennials, ages 27-36, say they share their salary with their colleagues more than any other age group and four times more than Baby Boomers, ages 53-71 (8%).

Talking about money is important, you just have to know how to approach it and how to utilize the information you learn. When I worked in corporate recruiting, I remember countless candidates used to tell me after the fact how they felt like they botched the negotiation or they didnt feel comfortable talking about money. The thing is, the more you talk about it, the more comfortable you become talking about it.

How to talk about money

Talking about money in a tactful way makes it less taboo. In fact, if you ask recruiters, theyll tell you they talk about money every single day. They essentially become numb to it but in a healthy way. It becomes no big deal. Thats why the more you talk about it (in the right setting, more on this in a moment), the more natural it becomes to have these conversations.

Be mindful of your approachespecially at workand keep your engagement open and honest. Select who youre going to speak with and when. Timing, after all, is everything. Instead of chatting it up around a water coolerwhere others may be privy to your conversation, keep it a bit more private and engage a coworker outside of the office or quietly at your cubicle. You can start the conversation with things like, I heard theres a new trend that colleagues are sharing what they earn, not for the sake of gossip, but to close the wage gapHey, if I tell you how much I earn and you tell me your salary, promise we wont get mad at each other if theres a difference?

Most importantly, if you find yourself about to spill details on your salary, make sure the person on the receiving end is willing to do the same this should be an exchange of information between the two of you. These conversations should remain positive and shouldnt become a battle about who makes more or less. After all, the goal isnt to be nosy, the goal is be to get paid what youre worth by knowing what youre worth.

Knowledge is power

Keep in mind that if you happen to find yourself on the receiving end of bad news such as disproportionate pay for doing the same job with very similar backgrounds, your initial reaction may be emotional. You may find yourself quickly filling with anger, resentment, frustration and even self-doubt. These feelings are normal but its important not to take it out on the other personafter all, theyre just the messenger. Instead, develop an action plan and start thinking through next steps for your current role or your exit plan for securing a new job.

Know what you are worth

Thats the most important nugget to retain. Not only is it important to have these conversation at work, its important to have these conversations with external colleagues and friends in your industry as well. This will help to provide a well-rounded viewpoint on where you are on the salary scale compared to others in similar roles. The outcome internally may not bear the results you want, but the point is, by doing this exercise, youre speaking more about money, its a more fluid conversation and by knowing what youre worth and becoming assertive about it, youll have more valuable information to serve as a guideline for your next external job interview.