This story is part of The Power Of The Queer Dollar, a series about how LGBTQ+ people spend, save and navigate their financial lives.

Sometimes I think about how, in an ideal world, I would be surrounded by queer people at all times. The man behind the counter at my local deli, the neighbor who watches TV a little too loudly, or hell, anyone in my own family. Anytime Ive wanted to be around other queer people, even in a city like New York, Ive had to make a concerted effort to do so. More often than not, that means spending money sometimes a lot of it to go out to the club or bar.

Apparently, most American adults make their closest friends in the workplace. Queer people might not have the luxury of finding friends who share their identities in places like an office, where they go to school or even in their neighborhoods if they dont live in a city where queer people feel safe to live openly. And for some of us, the first step to finding that community might be as fundamental as leaving our hometowns and migrating to cities with bigger LGBTQIA+ communities like New York or San Francisco, a move that comes with its own set of wallet-shattering costs.

Once were in these seemingly gayer cities, for better or worse, many queer people like me find that the swiftest way to find community is in nightlife . And the costs of clubbing and bar hopping from getting ready, to transportation, to buying drinks at city-inflated prices can add up in a big way.

Slar Rodrguez, a 23-year-old who lives in New York City, tells me that as a trans woman, theres a long list of financial decisions she has to make just to be able to be around other people in the community. For one, she feels a pressure to look a certain way so that shes respected and not misgendered. This usually involves makeup, a pricey wig and an outfit that affirms her gender identity. For me, when I go into a community, I want to be seen and accepted, she tells me. When you look good, you feel good.

When Rodrguez was growing up in the Bronx, she often had to travel to Brooklyn, which is known for its more inclusive queer scene, in order to attend parties and events that were welcoming to trans people. Because those events often happened late at night, she would have to take Ubers to increase her own safety. This meant charges of upwards of $120 round trip and thats not including any of the drinks or entrance fees shed have to pay at the parties themselves.