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Posted: 2024-05-17T07:00:23Z | Updated: 2024-05-17T07:00:23Z

Your stomach is full of butterflies, your heart is beating fast and your mind is consumed by thoughts of the new romantic partner you just cant seem to get enough of.

Theres a name for this rush of excitement and emotion when you start dating someone new: new relationship energy, sometimes abbreviated as NRE.

NRE can feel exhilarating and all-consuming, said Kate Balestrieri, a psychologist, sex therapist and founder of Modern Intimacy . Its like being under a spell, where everything about the new partner seems perfect and magical.

The term has roots in the polyamory community , but this common phenomenon applies to monogamous people too. Some liken the sensation to being under the influence of a powerful drug, Abigail Makepeace , a marriage and family therapist, told HuffPost.

This makes sense given that a heady cocktail of feel-good brain chemicals plays a major role in the NRE experience.

Dopamine levels surge, but levels of serotonin, the neurotransmitter that helps with feelings of satisfaction, may drop, said Dedeker Winston , host of the Multiamory podcast and co-author of Multiamory: Essential Tools for Modern Relationships.

This can lead to the feeling of a high that never quite feels like enough. You feel on top of the world when youre around your new love, but you still feel like you cant get enough, leading you to spend more and more time around them, Winston continued. For some, this is a wonderful feeling, and for others, this can feel obsessive and addictive.

Its like being under a spell, where everything about the new partner seems perfect and magical.

- Kate Balestrieri, psychologist and sex therapist

This period, also referred to as the honeymoon phase, typically lasts anywhere from a few months to a couple years, though the duration may vary depending on the individual and the relationship. Often, it tapers off within the first six to 12 months, Makepeace said.

And just because that NRE dissipates over time, that doesnt mean the love and passion just disappear, Balestrieri said.

Rather, they evolve into a deeper and more stable connection, she said. Understanding the phases of romantic relationships, including NRE, can help individuals navigate the highs and lows with greater awareness and resilience.

While the NRE stage can often be a fun and enjoyable experience, sometimes those intense feelings get the best of us and can veer into unhealthy territory. Below, relationship experts share the signs to watch out for and what to do to keep your NRE in check.

1. Youve stopped making time for the other important people in your life.

Its natural to be excited about hanging out with your new partner. But if youre consistently prioritizing plans with this person to the point that youre unable to nurture the relationships you have with friends and family, it could be a sign something is amiss.

If this turns into regularly bailing on plans with friends or ignoring communication from your loved ones or other partners, then you may have a problem on your hands, Winston said.

You may feel very fulfilled by this new relationship. Still, be careful not to isolate yourself from family and friends as you continue getting to know your partner.

Healthy relationships thrive on balance and maintaining connections outside of the romantic partnership, Balestrieri said. If someone finds themselves cutting ties with their support network or dismissing concerns from loved ones, it may indicate an unhealthy level of attachment or a controlling dynamic within the relationship.

2. Youre neglecting your commitments and interests outside of the relationship.

If youve stopped making time for your hobbies and the activities you love because of your infatuation with a person, consider it a sign that your NRE might be out of hand.

For example, you may have stopped exercising, studying, socializing with friends or pursuing your goals and hobbies altogether, Makepeace said. Instead, your new partner has taken precedence, becoming your primary focus and consuming all your time and attention.

Similarly, if your new relationship is interfering with your job or other responsibilities, its time to reassess.

This can include skipping work or social engagements, neglecting personal hygiene or ignoring important commitments, Balestrieri said.