Everything will be fine. This too shall pass. Stay positive! It could be worse.
If youve ever gone through a difficult time (a breakup, a job loss), youve probably heard some of these phrases ad nauseam from friends and family. People who say them no doubt have good intentions; theyre simply trying to put a rosy filter on the tough time youre having. It gets better, stay optimistic, they assure you.
But if statements like this are all youre hearing from your friends and family, that excess of positivity can be, well, negative.
This kind of encouragement and self-talk is so common that mental health experts have a name for it: toxic positivity.
Toxic positivity is the idea that we should focus only on positive emotions and the positive aspects of life, said Heather Monroe , a clinical social worker and director of program development at Newport Institute. Its the belief that if we ignore difficult emotions and the parts of our life that arent working as well, well be much happier.
The problem is, toxic positivity oversimplifies the human brain and how we process emotions, and it can actually be detrimental to our mental health, Monroe said.
You can fight toxic positivity by acknowledging or recognizing that multiple complex emotions can exist in you all at once.
- Jenny Maenpaa, New York City therapist
There can be long-term effects of toxic positivity including encouraging a person to remain silent about their struggles, Monroe said. Feeling connected to and heard by others is one of the most powerful antidotes to depression and anxiety, while isolation fuels these emotional issues. Often, trying to hide or deny feelings can lead to more stress on the body and increased difficulty in avoiding upsetting emotions.
Unblinking optimism and shutting the door on negative feelings doesnt make them go away; if anything, it exacerbates them.
Toxic positivity has gone into overdrive amid COVID-19.
Given the collective trauma were all experiencing with the coronavirus pandemic, toxic positivity is an especially relevant concept right now.
All those Instagram posts saying we need to lean into this experience, embrace spending more time with our family, get fit, pick up a new hobby, learn a new language, and finally write that novel? Thats toxic positivity, said Noel McDermott, a psychotherapist in London.
One of the biggest examples of toxic positivity is in the area of denial of the traumatic nature of the pandemic, McDermott said. You see it when people only promote the positive experience of lockdown in which they have been on a journey of self-development, learning to live in peace with their inner world.
He added: Even in normal times, becoming more inwardly focused is always a challenge, as we all have inner demons.
Toxic positivity subtly or not so subtly, as shown in the viral tweet below suggests that if youre not staying positive about this pandemic, youre in the wrong headspace.
It delegitimizes the very legitimate worries people have about their health, their family and friends health, and putting food on the table while unemployed or worrying about job security.
With the pandemic, the act of survival is mentally exhausting; few want to work on their side hustle or learn a second language when theyre worried about their families and saying goodbye to COVID-stricken loved ones via Zoom funerals.
As one man replied to the productivity-pushing tweet above: Most of us will be more than satisfied if we get through this without losing family members.
Of course, we can be a victim of our own toxic positivity, too. Think about your current outlook: Are you forcing toxic positivity on yourself during this pandemic? Have you given yourself time to sit with your grief and uneasiness over how life has changed? Or do you push those thoughts away as quickly as possible so you can focus on staying positive and grateful for what you do have?
Obviously, theres nothing wrong with counting your blessings during such a dark time. But you can do so while also acknowledging your uneasiness, said Jenny Maenpaa , a therapist in New York City.
You can fight toxic positivity by acknowledging or recognizing that multiple complex emotions can exist in you all at once, Maenpaa said. You can be devastated at the loss of life from COVID-19 and enjoy the hygge of quarantine.
Toxic positivity can be applied to systemic racism, too.
Toxic positivity can also affect how people see and respond to calls for racial justice.
The toxic positivity pusher might listen to someone share their personal stories involving racism and downplay it. They might offer some platitudes about the need for love and peace and positive thinking. They definitely dont want to dwell on the negative, as Jacquelyn Ogorchukwu Iyamah pointed out recently in an Instagram post about toxic positivity and racial oppression.
They might say that focusing on race is damaging to our progress and that avoiding any and all conversations is a more fulfilling and positive way to live life, Iyamah explained.
_(720p).jpg)
 OFFICIAL HD MUSIC VIDEO.jpg)
.jpg)
