Why Youre Screwing Yourself Over By Trying To Have It All

Sometimes, being an adult can feel like youre being pulled in 23 directions, at the same time. The pressure is 100% on to build a successful career that allows you responsibility, a decent pay-check, and plenty of skills and experience. At the same time, you are encouraged to find the perfect partner and settle down into family life before all of the good ones are gone! Theres also the youre only young once clause, driving you to go out and see the world, live life to the fullest, experience everything, whilst you are free and able. Not to mention the fact that even getting the job of your dreams will require a multitude of study and personal exploits to be fulfilled first.

The fact of the matter is, it is completely impossible to focus on all of these things at once, and do them all well. You can absolutely have a career, a relationship and a ton of interesting hobbies simultaneously. You cannot raise a child, work for a promotion, and train as a yoga instructor in the same year (unless you are a reincarnation of Wonder Woman).

And you know what, that is totally okay. It is completely fine to pick a strand and drive it forward for a while, letting everything else fall by the wayside a little bit.

Im not saying you should quit your job and focus 100% of your efforts onto securing a life-partner. But I am saying that you can let one thing ride along in a stable position for a while, allowing you to redirect your energy onto another priority.

The thing to remember is that we place a lot of focus on success and forward momentum, but sometimes, we forget that its perfectly fine for something to remain in a good place for a while without developing further. Its not great to leave things stagnating for years on end, but shifting your focus away from your career, or your relationship status, every few months to pick out a new interest or reignite an old one, is completely acceptable.

You dont have to be running marathons, getting promoted and engaged all at once. You just have to be happy with the direction that you are taking, and comfortable with the things that arent changing. Remember this everytime you feel overwhelmed by your priorities and focus on one until you find some more headspace.

Originally written by Elisabeth Tuck on Unwritten