"Kids will give you the biggest hug right before absolutely destroying your self-esteem in a drawing"
"me: did you have fun on your playdate? my 9yo: yes, but that was the wrong Logan. Next week can I have a playdate with the Logan who's my friend?"
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Best Parenting Tweets
"What did parents do before smart phones, hold their babies with two hands or something?"
"A dad is never lost on a road trip. We're just exploring our options for the best route."
"I dont really ever worry about being kidnapped because my 6yo would just find me and ask for a snack."
"Someone stop me from eating the same junk food that I just stopped my kid from eating."
"The kids were asking me what time they were all born and I said the youngest was born at 1:29am, and they all agreed that it must have been nice that she just came out while I was sleeping."
"I love my kids but I also love reminding them how many more days until school starts."
"Not my parents getting same-day delivery on a Lite Brite for my kids when I spent two years asking for one in the '90s."
"No parenting books or conversations ever prepared me for what to do when I hear 'I was bored so I woke the baby up.'"
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