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Posted: 2011-05-11T16:42:28Z | Updated: 2011-07-11T09:12:01Z

The fine folks at The Frenemy sat down and calculated how fictive columnist Carrie Bradshaw of "Sex and the City" fame led her luxurious lifestyle in one of the priciest cities around. So sayeth The Frenemy:

"You have to be poor as f**k because every writer, including myself, moves to NYC and feels oftentimes homeless. A good day is when you don't think 'Maybe I should cook these garbage rats for sustenance' and a great day is 'I have 35 dollars I'm going to finally be able to eat something other than canned beans and Four Loko.'"

And now, for the number crunching...

The job:

She writes one thing every week for a crappy newspaper. [...] I'd say a nice paycheck for a newspaper column is about 200 now, but let's say the economy was way better in 1998 and she could get 500 dollars a week for it.

The apartment:

She lives in a swanky ass one bedroom that's not even a studio which is insane. [...] Right now, an apartment her size would cost 2,400. But real estate use[d] to be better so I'll say that the apartment was 1,800.

Then, there's the cabs, lunch with her girls, the Cosmos and, of course, the clothes: "I can't even imagine ENTERING half the stores you enter. They all have white walls and Cheesecake Factory music and even the keychains are 400 dollars. And you sometimes really miss the mark with your fashion, Bradshaw. A newspaper print dress?"

The Frenemy's conclusion: Carrie Bradshaw would be approximately $3,000,000,000,000 in debt. But hey -- at least she'd have some killer shoes to wear to her bankruptcy hearing.

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