This article is part of a series called How to Human , interviews with memoirists that explore how we tackle lifes alarms, marvels and bombshells.

Mister Rogers was famous for telling children to look for the helpers in times of crisis, and here we are in a bona fide crisis, a pandemic. Though Mister Rogers is no longer with us, Franois S. Clemmons, who played Officer Clemmons for 25 years and acted as a unifying force amid racial inequality, is. Clemmons has a new memoir, Officer Clemmons: A Memoir, coming out Tuesday.

He writes in beautiful spare prose about a deeply traumatic upbringing experiencing domestic violence and racism that almost held him back from pursuing the study of music. He describes his struggle with coming out as homosexual, as well as what it meant to have a deep friendship with Fred Rogers. Clemmons sat down with HuffPost via Zoom in April to discuss his life and what Mister Rogers would think about this moment in history.

Today is your 75th birthday. Happy birthday! Its a big one.

Yes, it is! It is 75, and Ive had so many. Huh? Im having a lot of mixed emotions about it because Fred Rogers died at 74. He didnt make it to 75. So its like Im older than my surrogate daddy. I used to think of his age as patience, kindness, wisdom, a certain kind of understanding and insight.

What are your days looking like these days?

Well, to be really frank, I havent had a hug in almost two months.

Oh, oh, thats heartbreaking!

Oh, yeah. It is! Its heartbreaking to me, too. I had a moment about two weeks ago when I literally panicked. I was thinking, Im never going to hug anybody again. I did. I live alone. I see people on the street, but they chase me back in the house. Stay in the house, and stay safe! I know theyre doing what they feel is best for me. The big question, from my perspective, is what do we do to ourselves as a culture, as a society, when we isolate ourselves? Were gregarious. Were social people, and also, when theres a problem, we come together we sit, we talk about it. Everyone has some commentary, and you make certain kinds of decisions.

Yeah, thats what makes quarantine so hard.

Everyone is isolated. Thank God for Andrew Cuomo, the governor. Someone has stepped into that rank and has given us some real analytical understanding and thinking, adult thinking, about this virus. It has stirred up our society to the very core.

The other part of that is when we grieve, when someone dies, we like to hold their hand. We like to rub their shoulders and maybe get a couple last kisses. Theres an intimacy, a hugging that we, as human beings, our species requires that.

Theres no consolation now because we cut that step out. So you cant touch. You cant be in the same room. You have to have a glass separating you or a mask and all that stuff. So you dont get to hold the hands of your beloved who is dying. We need that as a human being, as a species.

We really do.

People who have partners, this is again just my opinion, they dont quite get the desperation of the single person because they literally dont have to deal with it. Even when youre in a marriage or with a partner whom you dont talk to very much, you dont feel alone. Youve got that other body that moves around, doing its thing. So that is a catch, and there are lots of single people in this society. Thats the other thing Im really aware of, and theyre not all over 75.