I was doing my Sunday run when a younger, faster, woman caught up with me. She slowed to my speed and we started chatting. She asked me if I ever did group runs and I told her I could not because I have three kids so I just have to run when I can. She told me she was a medical resident so she also had to run when she could. We continued to run and chat together for the next mile or so. She was shocked to find out that I have a full-time job, three kids, and run on a regular basis.

How do you do it all? she asked, mouth agape.

Well, I told her, honestly, You dont. Something has to give.

She nodded, wide-eyed, trying to comprehend what I had just told her. I can still remember being in college wondering how women do it all and I do not believe I would have been satisfied hearing that it was out of reach to have it all.

But here I am, older and wiser, admitting that I dont have it all; and I sure as heck dont have it all figured out.

I dont have a door on one of my kitchen cupboards right now. The four-year-old broke it off months ago and neither my husband or myself has cared about it enough to fix it. I am also missing a door on the entertainment center. That one has been missing for years so the odds are not looking so good that it will get fixed.

I DO have all the kids school pictures from last year. ALL OF THEM. As in, I never gave them out to anyone. I spent over a hundred dollars on pictures that are still neatly in their packages in a pile on my kitchen counter (the one that is above the cupboard missing the door.)

I dont have a real good idea of what the week after next will bring. All of the events are listed on my calendar, I just cant look at them yet. One day at a time is my motto! It works really great until you get to the day that everyone has a soccer game at the same time, different fields, but you have no plan because you were too busy living in the moment.

I dont have a house that is clean to my standards. I view cleaning the house as a shared responsibility of all of its inhabitants. The only problem with that philosophy is that their definition of clean is nothing like my definition of clean. Or like the nine-year-old says, My definition of clean is that there IS NO definition of clean. So you can imagine what my house looks like right now.

I dont have the energy or patience for a lot of crafty things that I feel like I should be doing with my kids. Thankfully, our family and the kids teachers do, so the kids are not missing out on the wonders of tie-dye shirts and magnetic slime.

I dont have the same connections with my friends that I wish I did. We see each other from time to time and it is always like nothing has changed, but in the meantime, months and months of little to no contact has gone by and I cannot help but wish to put in more effort to keep those connections strong because they keep me sane.

I dont have a great system for remembering important things, like the due date for lunch money or the homeowners insurance. But its worked out fine; when I forget to pay, I just get a strongly worded letter and then I remember real quick!

What I do have is a very happy house full of people that are just dysfunctional enough to be funny. I have a loving marriage with a man that thinks that I am just the greatest (the feeling is mutual.) I have three incredibly well-adjusted, intelligent, and kind sons that I am excited to come home to at the end of a long day. And, I have a rewarding career that allows me to feel like I am helping the world be a little better; and that makes me feel not terrible about paying back my student loan debt each month.

So I might not have it all, but I am pretty sure that I have everything that matters. To me.