Imagine how long a rope would need to be to reach the moon. Thats half as long as the story my kid is telling me about Roblox.

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My kids: bitterly fighting each other whose turn it is to play Roblox

Also my kids: spending 3 hours sitting together watching some other kid on YouTube playing Roblox

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Welcome to parenting: Your child can recite all the intricate details of the latest Roblox update, but can't remember where he left his homework last night.

Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) November 27, 2018","type":"rich","meta":{"author":"Robert Knop","author_url":"https://twitter.com/FatherWithTwins","cache_age":86400,"description":"Welcome to parenting: Your child can recite all the intricate details of the latest Roblox update, but can't remember where he left his homework last night. 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Me: \"Miles, what do you want Santa to bring you?\"

Miles (7): \"Um maybe just some Robux?\"

Me: \"I'm not sure Santa's elves know how to do micro transactions, they mostly make toys... and order things on Amazon\"

Mike Metcalf (@mikemetcalf) December 14, 2019","type":"rich","meta":{"author":"Mike Metcalf","author_url":"https://twitter.com/mikemetcalf","cache_age":86400,"description":"Me: \"Miles, what do you want Santa to bring you?\"Miles (7): \"Um maybe just some Robux?\"Me: \"I'm not sure Santa's elves know how to do micro transactions, they mostly make toys... and order things on Amazon\" Mike Metcalf (@mikemetcalf) December 14, 2019\n\n","options":{"_maxwidth":{"label":"Adjust width","placeholder":"220-550, in px","value":""},"_theme":{"value":"","values":{"dark":"Use dark theme"}}},"provider_name":"Twitter","title":"Mike Metcalf on 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My 6-year-old got a letter from our health insurance company asking if he has any other health insurance plans. Hopefully he didnt sign up for one through Roblox.

Andrew Knott (@aknott21) July 2, 2020","type":"rich","meta":{"author":"Andrew Knott","author_url":"https://twitter.com/aknott21","cache_age":86400,"description":"My 6-year-old got a letter from our health insurance company asking if he has any other health insurance plans. Hopefully he didnt sign up for one through Roblox. 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If were ever messaging and theres a delay in my response, just know its because my daughter had to show me her Roblox avatars new outfit.

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My kids speak 2 languages: English and Roblox.

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Raise your hand if you hate Fortnite and Roblox, but also secretly love them because they prove your kid can focus on something for more than 1.8 seconds.

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Neighborhood kid: Can I come in and play?
9yo: Not until you give back my brother's pet in Roblox.

Wow, I'm totally winning parenting.

Robert Knop (@FatherWithTwins) March 9, 2019","type":"rich","meta":{"author":"Robert Knop","author_url":"https://twitter.com/FatherWithTwins","cache_age":86400,"description":"Neighborhood kid: Can I come in and play?9yo: Not until you give back my brother's pet in Roblox.Wow, I'm totally winning parenting. 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Thoughts and prayers for my 8y.o., whose Ipad charger malfunctioned. She doesnt mourn the missing of her online class this morning, mind you, but is devastated to have missed a Roblox wedding.

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Lord grant me the persistence of my child still talking to me about Roblox after I have expressed blatant disinterest for weeks on end

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If you dont know what robux means can I please borrow your life for like five minutes.

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The same kid who follows me into the bathroom to tell me about the newest item he got in Roblox just yelled at his sister to give him privacy. Nothing like a little karma to start the day off right. #mommytwitter

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Before I had kids, I had no idea someone could talk to me about Roblox for 635 days in a row.

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My kids are on Facetime with my mom and they just launched into the Roblox portion of the conversation so I should be free for at least a couple hours now!

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Me:
6y:
Me:
6y:
Me:
6y:
Me:
6y: YESTERDAY I WAS PLAYING ROBLOX AND

AsKateWouldHaveIt (@KateWouldHaveIt) August 22, 2017","type":"rich","meta":{"author":"AsKateWouldHaveIt","author_url":"https://twitter.com/KateWouldHaveIt","cache_age":86400,"description":"Me:6y:Me:6y:Me:6y:Me: 6y: YESTERDAY I WAS PLAYING ROBLOX AND AsKateWouldHaveIt (@KateWouldHaveIt) August 22, 2017\n\n","options":{"_maxwidth":{"label":"Adjust width","placeholder":"220-550, in px","value":""},"_theme":{"value":"","values":{"dark":"Use dark theme"}}},"provider_name":"Twitter","title":"AsKateWouldHaveIt on 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Me:
6y:
Me:
6y:
Me:
6y:
Me:
6y: YESTERDAY I WAS PLAYING ROBLOX AND

AsKateWouldHaveIt (@KateWouldHaveIt) August 22, 2017

Please refer to the syllabus for today's lesson in Middle Grade Mondays, I'm going to need you to download the supplementary materials of Roblox and Fortnite's Party Hub

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Whenever I want quiet time, I ask my kid how to Minecraft a Pikachu in Roblox.

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No one:

My kid: Let me give you a 43-minute tour of my Roblox house, starting with my rainbow-themed kitchen.

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Im staying 6 feet away from my kids. Im not social distancing, I just need a break from Roblox stories.

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My kid just told me she cleaned up her room, but then I realized she meant in Roblox and I'm pretty sure I'm doing this all wrong.

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Downloading Roblox Studio to work with girls on game creation. pic.twitter.com/Pa7WEpdjWJ

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Listen son, I love you. Its your money and you can spend it how youd like. But wow... as your father, I have to tell you that spending all of your allowance on Robux is the worst financial decision in the history of blowing money out your a$$.

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When your kid complains about having to take care of his pet in the Roblox game Adopt Me.
I have to feed it, play with it, and bring it to the playground even when I dont want to go!

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In order to stop myself from impulse buying stuff on Amazon, I went looking for Roblox codes for my son instead. Solid work.

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My kids have taken to sitting on our back porch and playing Roblox with the kid who lives on the other side of the fence. Its great since it counts as an outdoor activity.

Andrew Knott (@aknott21) December 13, 2020","type":"rich","meta":{"author":"Andrew Knott","author_url":"https://twitter.com/aknott21","cache_age":86400,"description":"My kids have taken to sitting on our back porch and playing Roblox with the kid who lives on the other side of the fence. Its great since it counts as an outdoor activity. 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My kids are all engrossed in their summer reading.

Hahaha, I mean they're crowded around the computer watching their brother play ROBLOX.

TheBabyLady (@thebabylady7) July 27, 2017","type":"rich","meta":{"author":"TheBabyLady","author_url":"https://twitter.com/thebabylady7","cache_age":86400,"description":"My kids are all engrossed in their summer reading. Hahaha, I mean they're crowded around the computer watching their brother play ROBLOX. 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How to spot a parent posing as a child in the google chat:
Kelsey: wanna play Roblox rn lmao
Lola: yeah XD
Mia: XD lol yesss
Michelle: Hello girls. This is Michelle. Please remove me from this chat. It is distracting me from my school work. Thank you.
Kelsey: Bruh lmao

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My kid: *talking about roblox*

Me: Interest rates are at an all time low.

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83% of my sons stories start with So theres this new game in Roblox...

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Don't worry, parents. Your kids will stop talking about Minecraft and Pokemon when they discover they can talk incessantly about Roblox.

Meg the Magnificent (@meghaffer) December 10, 2017","type":"rich","meta":{"author":"Meg the Magnificent","author_url":"https://twitter.com/meghaffer","cache_age":86400,"description":"Don't worry, parents. Your kids will stop talking about Minecraft and Pokemon when they discover they can talk incessantly about Roblox. 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My 6-year-old said if he had one wish it would be that everyone who dies just respawns. So, hes clearly very sweet and sensitive, and also probably playing a little too much Minecraft and Roblox.

Andrew Knott (@aknott21) June 14, 2020","type":"rich","meta":{"author":"Andrew Knott","author_url":"https://twitter.com/aknott21","cache_age":86400,"description":"My 6-year-old said if he had one wish it would be that everyone who dies just respawns. So, hes clearly very sweet and sensitive, and also probably playing a little too much Minecraft and Roblox. 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Me: We will start giving you a small allowance each week if you complete all of your chores.
Kid: How many robux are we talkin?

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For you parents who think nothing is worse than suffering through your childs Minecraft stories, just wait until your kid discovers Roblox.

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Me to 8: Don't let strangers be friends w/you on Roblox!
Me: *follows 9 strangers back on Twitter
8: Mom! Don't follow strangers on Twitter!

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Dear Diary, We are on day 42 of Quarantine. It was all going fine, until today, when my 10yo had her Roblox account hacked and her flying flamingo stolen. Now, it is the end of times. Send help.

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child 1, typing in the Roblox chat: ugh, Dad is so overprotective

child 2: ikr? Like sir, go write your encyclopedias or something

child 3, who is 5: ;asdfkjbqweq;wer234r

Kwame Big Denim Mbalia (@KSekouM) March 9, 2020","type":"rich","meta":{"author":"Kwame Big Denim Mbalia","author_url":"https://twitter.com/KSekouM","cache_age":86400,"description":"child 1, typing in the Roblox chat: ugh, Dad is so overprotectivechild 2: ikr? 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The thing that might break me during this pandemic is I am rapidly losing the ability to look like I care about Roblox.

Julia Sugarbaker is speaking (@TheMudlily) December 1, 2020","type":"rich","meta":{"author":"Julia Sugarbaker is speaking","author_url":"https://twitter.com/TheMudlily","cache_age":86400,"description":"The thing that might break me during this pandemic is I am rapidly losing the ability to look like I care about Roblox. 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My son: Daddy! Im so glad your...laptop is home so I can play Roblox again!

Oh, my heart.

Andrew Knott (@aknott21) February 24, 2019","type":"rich","meta":{"author":"Andrew Knott","author_url":"https://twitter.com/aknott21","cache_age":86400,"description":"My son: Daddy! Im so glad your...laptop is home so I can play Roblox again! Oh, my heart. 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\"Ugggh, I'm so much better than him.\"

- my 9yo watching YouTubers play Roblox games

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